3 books & A movie
Sunday, February 12, 2006
♥ Sunday, February 12, 2006
This is the first time im reading Catherine Lim. Singapore Author. Fascinating style of writing, painted against such a familiar background of singlish, chinese names etc etc gives this story a very comfortable setting for amateur readers and thinkers like me:). Following the Wrong God Home(200106) strikes me as that of a colourful story- one that is realistic, and painted with literary description. Haha, unlike Oscar Wilde and maybe Shakespeare, Catherine Lim's description isnt too abstract for my own enjoyment. Nevertheless, at this time on doing reflection, the book hasnt created much of a platform for further insight or relevance to my life, or faith( if these 2 aspects should even be separated).
More cheem literature up next! A Thousand Acres(060206) by Jane Smiley, brings a very dark family setting into the storybook realm. What started out as 'happy family', took a turn, when the father wanted to give his 'thousand acres' to his daughters; the youngest daughter rejected, her father cut her off... and it progressed to an affair of the oldest daughter with a friend, and then the father messing up relationships with the 2 elder daughters, enlisting the helpp of the youngest daugther( whom he cut off relations earlier) to sue the other daughters for misuse of the land..to the eldest daughter discovering a relationship between her secret love and her younger sister! What the heck man..its super convulated. haha, and its tough literature. Unlike Catherine Lim, this one's philosophical and cheem. Jane Smiley captures your attention: provided you give her your fullest attention. For me, the few distractions in army sure made htis book at times a drag. Oh, and its made into a movie, starring Michelle Pfeiffer. I have a gut feeling, she's that of the jealous elder sister. Her role in Catwoman, ( Batman Returns), gives me the impression that the director would have chosen her for her talent for displaying such internal torment and unrest. But, havent watched it yet.
the next book, sure gripped me, as it did millions of readers. i approached this book after much hesitation and contemplation...there just too much hoo hah about it, and i needed something to catch my attention. Da Vinci Code(080206) is highly captivating. Explosive( as the author so love using) its story, but at the end of the day, sad to say, the remnants of it is a mere matter of emotional feel good. Fun book to read, and credit is definitely due the author. Here lies the but; you put yourself in the story, and you take yourself out. And what you got, hmm..is not much. Haha, but still, im looking forward to the other 3 books he wrote. ANd i got it at a damn gd buy!
& a movie. Finally, i watched it. Raimond Gaita actually quoted quite abit of it in his book, Good and Evil. SCHINDLER'S LIST. In bold for being directed by the all too famous Steven Spielberg. The Painist, Hotel Rwanda, Schindler's list, and although i din watch much, Constant Garderner all have this 'thing' in this story. Its not feel-good, its not really, pity or compassion..but whatever it is, this feeling lingers. In Hotel Rwanda, the scene of the nun and children running in for shelter in the rain, thoroughly affected me. In Schindler's list, just as in the Pianist, its the hopelessness of oppression. But i think, what i brought home, was that the life and crosses that i go through, is but a fraction of what others have to endure. And somehow, when its all bleak, there'll be people, like Oskar Schindler or Paul Rusesebegina or Valerie or Samson- the little "Jesus-es" that walk in and let you know there's something to hope and pray about. Hey! Mariah Carey's "Hero" came to mind. Its apt.
2 Days
♥ Sunday, February 12, 2006
Somehow, i think i should be an author- i go into the technicalities of my blog's title, how i should start, what inspiration drives me to what theme etc etc etc. :)
Friday(100206) Went for a swim with Val, met up with a few of them for dinner, met this new guy called Fang Long, visited Singapore's hotspots, had a late night. Satuday (110206), watched Rocky,went for a run, went to Daryl's place for bai nian, Marist meetup, and watched Constant Gardener with my sister & brother- 1st movie i ever dozed off (momentarily, only ah!) whilst watching in a theatre.
Marists. Tonight's meeting up had a pretty ardous history. But it sure turned out alright didnt it? A good 15 of us showed up, all talking about army, all reliving the fruits of a journey walked together. It was rough, especially the organizing phases. And it seriously piss me off when ppl ask 'who's going'. Somehow, it irritates me that a 6 year friendship ' clause' isnt good enough a reason to actually meetup, out of the sake of even just meeting up. But, the gathering happened, and it was a moment we brought back as 'colour' to this weekend right?
Talking with Samson is nice. Somehow i am always challenged to have tt kinda lucidity about life, choices and convictions tt he has. I think among so many of them, Samson's the few i get to dwell deeper with. Had me thinking too. I realised I am so fickle. Perhaps its the fear of making a wrong choice, maybe its because i never grew outta the fact i lived my life without real purpose, perhaps its the gravity of each choice that i have to make, maybe its the lack of maturity, maybe its because i question too much. Whatever the "maybes" or "perhaps", it is a kinda stifle to making decisions- evidently in what course i wanna take in NUS, and my relationship. Hard as I fight it, i know it is a nature that i have only become too familiar of. So, for now, its chem engine. When the tide goes up, it might be aerospace or law; when its down, i think i'll keep it as chem engine. What are my considerations, really? To make happy money. Happy, then money.
Realised that i have issues reconciling. Somehow, i think the problem lies with the fact that i went through a period of my life with this person. And in that time, i lost myself, in a way that can only be described as 'spiritual'. But it was all wrong. So this 'exchange', became a sad loss of self. And its that 'self' that i have yet to retrieve. Simply, putting, i have to make peace with myself ( to piece myself). Hmm, i htink the books have taken this profound impact on me: though i cant make complete sense out of the stuff i read, its analogous similarity to my life have allowed me to make certain conclusions that i can only feel is right saying, and yet not fully understand why or how it is right. So, am still praying. Its in desperation that prayer brings God from the knowledge realm, into the physical realm. He holds my hand, ever more tightly, when i suffocate under the weight of my cross. You're there, always.
2 days.
Hush.
Sunday, February 05, 2006
♥ Sunday, February 05, 2006
Booking in in about 2 hours time. See if i'll get the chance to drop by ado.
I think, one thing adoration does for me, is that it allows me to be quiet. Not that my life is buzzing with activity. But, somehow, at certain moments of life, when the doing just doesnt seem right anymore, stopping and being still restores that certain "equilibrium" of life. Ok, sounds abit cheem, even to myself. Sanctuary, calmness, serenity, peace. Thats i guess, a tiny interpretation of what 'equilibrium' could mean.
Week after next, i'll be goin to thailand for a good 3 weeks. Man, i wonder whats THAT gonna be. Realise i sometimes escape and distract myself to find this quietness. At this point in time, its books. Obviously. Naturally. i escape into the realm of the author's thoughts, imaginations and for that little half an hour, i have my space. A space independent of the questions, independent of the struggles, a space that i see not myself, but the story. i somehow begin living by sieving out negativity. All in attempts to be quiet, i guess.
Past week have been a weekend of unprecedented events. The chain reaction of Cause and Effects. The soccer and thus the sprained leg. The sprained ankle and thus the un-accomplished tasks. The un-accomplishments and thus the very nice meeting ups with Val and Mel. The very nice meeting ups and thus the flow of thoughts. The flow of thoughts and thus, this damn blog entry, haha. But what i found, is that it really, really does feel good to be in community. Again.
Evelyn (church one) mentioned the challenges of leadership in the community. And then, quite inevitably i think, she asked me what i thought. I must have blanked out. Thats the truth i guess, of every 'leadership' talk in community. A deadend. A deadend reasoned by a lack of experience, an inferiority, a lack of commitment, an inability to commit..blah blah blah. Reasons, excuses, however i or you might wanna see it.
Got to talk to someone who was quite sad recently. Somehow i've walked the path she walked, but whilst she shared, and i empathized the despair she was chained to, i couldnt verbalize how i walked out of mine. Did God make so little sense in that little conversation we had that i could not let her see the reality and power of His love? And then it struck me too, that on dealing with one's own demons, the dismissal of it is the beginning of healing. Just how at that time, studies and the chance to do a little at Tanjong Balai gave me some form of an "out", so must we break out and distract ourselves from the hypnotism of depression. Maybe, deep within, its another call to just be quiet. Really, quiet.
So, its a fruitful wkend. And thanks to those who dropped by and who were concerned. Appreciate it!
