Wednesday, March 28, 2007
♥ Wednesday, March 28, 2007
There are just some things that perk this meagre excuse of an existence.
One of which are irretrieably, and undeniably- birthdays.
Its one of those days you are reminded that you exist. To yourself, to the people around you, even to the anonymous.- i just received 2messages from strangers i barely got acquainted with.
Sometimes, such reminders are imperative. When you lived a good twenty one years, with the nagging questions and the disappointing answers, you stop bothering... the camouflage of answers and truth are not invulnerable to time. Time reveals what is necessary...in a matter of time.
Certainly there will be expectations. Of your birthday, and people of you. But Catherine Lim said, in the case of parents, expectations and hopes, and even well wishes...more often than not, come in the annoying form of admonitions. So, well, a parent's love to a child effectively begins with...some sorta scolding. How about friends? Well, they express it under slightly different circumstances. Forget the reasons at which they do. Instead, lets scrutinise the how!
Some would drop a message, more of endearment...some would drop you a call, catch up on old times. Some, with the proliferation of the internet, would use email or the chatrooms like msn..to drop some amiable note of congratulations. Perhaps a surprise would wait for you around the corner? Perhaps not. The excitement that lies with friends, is that there is very little room for prediction.
I had one of the most exciting quarrels of my life. At first glace, when one mentions a quarrel, it invokes a sympathy, a call to understand? Or perhaps a baseless judgement on one's bellicose character? Either way, that bears no matter to me.
The quarrel started with Desmond asking why there wasnt a movie. And then yiming with his blatant attempts to push the blame. And then my defensive mechanisms got psyched up. Ended with torrence's attempt to analyse and make the situation palatable enough to not be the victim. There was so much fun in it. Maybe it was because of the prior anger, and the impossibility of us to get angry with each other. Maybe it was just at that point in time, nobody wanted to get angry, but they just wanted to get the issue out of them. Maybe hilarity was innate in friendship. I do not know.
And yes, it carried on for a good while...with a huge commotion. Such joy in such belligerence. Desmond, regretful for the upheaval he caused. Linus and Mun Pun laughing away at the hilarity of the sudden explosion. Yi ming irritated at my recalcitrance, torrence smiling and making his comments felt, and i berating my head off, Chian Yee a third party to the argument,. trying to shift the entire matter to a different subject.
Therein lies the truth of a matter. That when people, friends , come together, it is not so often commonality that binds...but sometimes, sheer freedom of stupidity. we're free to express, holding nothing back. No ambitions, no need to hide behind veneers of intellect and spirituality, nothing... because nothing is revealed... and actually, everything is.
I think i am reading too many jodi picoult...haha thats why my emotional reflections also take off from where she left. But cant help it really..she's just so damn good. Waiting for someone to get me Nineteen Minutes! argh...haha hope i don have to spend another 20 bucks on her books.
